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OPTION 1: Write a short story or scene involving one or more HL Immortal character and an offbeat and unexpected consequence of the effects of a Quickening.

*OPTION 2: Write a short story or scene where an Immortal's Quickening energy manifests itself in a weird or unexpected manner, independent of any beheadings.

Every computer help-desk operator has a horror story: the man who thought his CD-ROM drive was a cup-holder, the grandmother who put her computer’s mouse on the floor and used it like a sewing machine pedal, the man who wondered why his computer wouldn’t work during a power failure, the Macintosh user who evacuated his home because he saw a picture of a bomb on the monitor screen. So far, however, none have been able to outdo this one. The following is an actual transcript of a help-desk phone session.

[Note: recording begins somewhat abruptly as the client is taken off Hold.]

[Female Voice #1] "…can’t believe you did this! You know I use this machine for work, yet you just couldn’t keep your hands—"

[Female Voice #2] "Hey! Don’t blame this on me. You’re the one who had a temper tantrum."

[Help Desk] (faint sigh) "Help Desk, thank you for waiting. My name’s Wes, what seems to be the problem today?"

[FV #1] "Thank goodness! I need to recover some lost data on my machine. This is an emergency: I’m an author and I’m under a deadline. I have to get what I was working on back again, and quickly."

[HD] "Calm down, Ma’am. How much data do you think was lost?"

[FV #1] "From what I can tell, all of it. The computer’s useless, it won’t work at all."

[HD] "All right, we’ll see what we can do. Can you tell me exactly what happened?"

[FV #1] (pause) "Umm, well, there’s not much to say. I got mad at the machine and it just… stopped working."

[HD] "I see. You were using your computer, there were some problems, you got mad and the computer stopped working."

[FV #1] "No, I wasn’t using the computer. Someone else was using it, without my permission. That’s why I got mad." [FV#2, interrupting] "Will you stop trying to blame this on me!"

[HD] "Let’s stay focused here. You say you got mad; could you be a bit more specific? Did you hit the machine?"

[FV #1] "No."

[HD] "Kick it?"

[FV #1] "No."

[HD] "Drop it?"

[FV #1] "No!"

[HD] "Throw it?"

[FV #1] "No! I’m not a complete idiot. I walked in, saw Am—my friend mooching my machine, and lost my temper. There was a big blue flash, a lot of sparks, and the computer shut down."

[HD] (muttered) "Finally!" (aloud) "Ohhh-kay. I really don’t think that this has anything to do with you getting angry. It sounds like there was an electrical surge."

[FV #1] "Electrical surge?" (pause) [FV #2] (giggling) [FV#1] "Yeah, I guess that’s as good a description as any."

[HD] "Was there a fuse blown in your building; a thunderstorm in the area?"

[FV #1] "No, nothing like that. Though it did come very close to having a storm…" [FV#2] "You wouldn’t dare!" [FV#1] "Don’t tempt me."

[HD] (trying to change the subject) "Okay. Now, did you have a hardcopy of any of this?"

[FV #1] (frustrated) "I’m an author, a novelist. If I printed out every rough draft, I’d end up using up an entire forest!"

[HD] "All right, stay calm. I was just asking. Do you have any sort of back up whatsoever? Tape back up? Floppy disk? Zip drive? CD-ROM?"

[FV #1] "Of course I had floppies! I always have floppies."

[HD] "Okay, now we’re getting somewhere. You shouldn’t have any problem getting your work back from the disks."

[FV#1] "That would be true. Except for the fact that my disks appear to have had a Zen experience."

[HD] (confused) "I’m sorry, a Zen experience?"

[FV #2] (giggling) "Yes, they’ve become one." (dull thudding sound)

[HD] "Please don’t drop the disks, they may still be recoverable."

[FV #1] "Not without a hammer and chisel."

[HD] "You know, I feel obligated to remind you that it’s not good to keep your disks on top of the computer."

[FV #1] (angrily) "They weren’t on top of the computer. They weren’t anywhere near the computer!"

[HD] (cautiously) "Look, this is sounding more and more like a hardware problem; I’m not sure how much I can do for you. Do you have a service center where you’d be able to take the machine?"

[FV #2] "That’s what I suggested." [FV#1] "I’d love to do that, but it would be a bit difficult. You see, the machine is partially melted into the floor."

[HD] (nervous) "Melted? Is everyone okay where you are? Was there a fire?"

[FV #1] (quickly) "No, no fire. Nobody got hurt. Just the blue flash, the sparks, and the big meltdown. My machine is now a lump."

[HD] "All right. If you can recover the hard drive, you might be able to install it in another machine…"

[FV #1] "I can’t get to the hard drive. I can’t even open the cover. What part of ‘my machine is lump’ didn’t you understand?"

[HD] (frustrated) "Let me get this straight. You’re trying to tell me that your computer overloaded for absolutely no reason, the machine physically melted, and all your floppy disks, stored elsewhere in the room, also melted. You do realize that there is a penalty for abusing this service?"

[FV #1] (extremely angry) "Now you’re going to imply that I’m a liar? You’re just going to sit there in your little geek cubicle, with your little headset leash, telling me, after everything I’ve been through today, that my problems are nothing more than a prank phone call?!?"

Note: At this point, there was a sizzling noise, and the phone line went dead. The operator was unable to reestablish contact with the client, nor any other outside line. The operator could not resume his duties until his headset was replaced and he was reassigned to another station. The cubicle where this incident occurred needed to be rewired completely. To this day, no technician has been able to explain this incident. No one knows whether the client’s problem was solved, nor whether it was a legitimate case. It remains a mystery.